On Ching Chong and Gaycial Slurs...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061215/ap_en_tv/people_rosie_o_donnell_12

Oh my good freakin’ grief. And yet, also, like cosmic justice. OK, I’m getting ahead of myself and am incoherent.

So, for those of you who’d rather skip the “news” article, Rosie O’Donnell recently joked on “The View” about how Danny DiVito’s drunk visit to the show probably made global news. Rather than say this (as I just did) in a boring way, she chose figurative humor—go figure, as she’s a comedienne.

Well, guess what? This offended people and now Rosie is under fire to render the exact apology formula to soothe the souls tortured by her shocking display of cultural insensitivity. But, here’s the thing, she was not making fun of Chinese people…she was making fun of those of us who don’t speak Chinese.

We all—by now—know Asian languages (or any languages we do not, ourselves, speak) are valid languages spoken by intelligent and valid people with rich histories, personalities and perspectives. I mean, duh. However, when one’s ear and brain do not comprehend the language, one is left with the general sounds of the language. To our English-only ears, newscasts from China pretty much sound like O’Donnell’s silly interpretation.

Because they sound like that to our ears does not imply that we truly believe they are saying “ching chong ching chong” or that we believe they are not saying anything. It just means we are lazy dunderheads who do not have the time or inclination to learn foreign languages. It also means that other languages sound funny when we do not, ourselves, speak them; especially when those languages insert names and/or words we are familiar with.

I’m sure that English sounds funny to people who do not speak it and I’m sure that non-English speakers can generate some sort of phonetic gibberish to mimic what English must sound like to them. The thing is, I’d find that funny. Bring it on. I’m totally curious how a non-English speaker would phonetically point fun at English.

Yeah, yeah, I imagine the “ching chong” thing has been used to mock others. Most words have been used to mock others. However, I doubt O’Donnell had mean intentions and I seriously wish people would settle down and consider intentions before getting all lathered up.

Ironically, O’Donnell herself presented as an offended party regarding the Clay Aiken/Kelly Rippa spat. For those of you who have way better things to do than follow the drama of daytime television, Rippa, pissed about Aiken covering her mouth with his hands while attempting to shut her up so he could participate in an interview, said something about “…I don’t know where your hands have been…” To O’Donnell, this clearly represented a homophobic remark and she spouted off about it on “The View.”

Of course, Rippa denied this and pointed out that it’s cold and flu season.

If O’Donnell can interpret Rippa’s statement as homophobic—even though Aiken hasn’t come out as gay—I guess it’s fair that assorted Chinese-Americans may be offended by “ching chong ching chong.”

I mean, really, let’s all be offended and demand apologies. Being offended is definitely “in.” I’m offended, he’s offended, she’s offended, they’re offended…wouldn’t you like to be offended too?